This is a great activity to do solo or in a group (even virtually). It's called Masks and the premise ties into our conversation about Code Switching.
We all, from a very young age, learn to adapt our behavior to different situations, environments and to people. For example, we all know to whisper as soon as we enter a library. We all act a bit different at school from what we do at home. We all can put on different personas when we're trying to make a certain impression on a new acquaintance.
These adaptations, big and small are like wearing temporary masks. They cover us just enough, for a short period of time. We can wear a mask to be "cool", "smart", "funny", "outgoing" or "in control" when we may not really BE any of those things in a given moment. We all play this game and for the most part, we all get away with it.
Masks are not necessarily bad. They can be an effective defense mechanism. But, let's focus on the ones that we choose to wear. The ones that we can admit are not entirely who we want to be. Chances are good that they are well-intentioned, but that they may also cost you something of value...like real connection with others.
So, here are four questions to answer for yourself:
1. What is your mask? Give it a name like "The Smart One", "The Funny Guy" etc
2. When do you wear it? What situations cause you to wear it?
3. What does it cover up? What do you think you are hiding with it? (Example: Some people use humor to cover up insecurity, or a lack of comfort)
4. What does it cost you? Have you lost a chance for a genuine connection? Did you scare off a friend/relationship with one of your masks?
**Write down your answers and share them with someone. If you are in a group, take turns sharing your masks with each other. Just listen to one another and see what you can learn about yourself and others. Masks can be very revealing. Be sure to respect and thank others for being vulnerable and authentic.